Big Brother Furniture

On Friday, we got Caedmon’s new furniture. I’d like to just post some pictures and leave it at that, but you know I can’t. Because it was one of those days I was ready to yell “Serenity now!” by 10:30am. And that’s never good.

I’d already cleaned and prepped Caedmon’s room for the switch. As in, I’d cleaned out all excess stuff and all we had to do was take the old furniture out and move the new furniture in. But it’s never that easy. Especially with a three year-old about.

I’d slept horribly the night before and could hardly drag myself out of bed. Caedmon, however was up and bouncing around bright and early. And to make my morning more enjoyable, he and Husband started some sort of tickling/wrestling game on our bed while I was trying to be lazy and slowly work myself into a state where I could interact with people.

So I got up and finally managed to get into Caedmon’s room to start the un-furnituring process. (I know it’s not a word. But I don’t care.) Caedmon was oh so eager to help. And also ask approximately 72 billion questions in the process. My brain was tired before I even started, and it started to hurt. Husband and I moved the chest of drawers that will become Baby Sister’s out, and continued moving toys, etc. out of the way.

Just for the record, furniture anchors, while a great safety feature and might indeed save your kid from getting squashed by a piece of furniture that might randomly fall on them, are of the devil. It took forever to install them, and the “easy remove” feature is just a flat out lie. Because I spent more time trying to get those stupid things to “remove” than it took to actually move the furniture.

And then we had a meltdown. Caedmon, not me. We found an old sticker under his nightstand that was actually two stickers that were stuck together. The back was nasty, with all sorts of fuzz and the like stuck to it. They were bent, crumpled, and generally maimed. Definitely trash. Since he was so eager to help, I handed it to Caedmon and asked him to throw it away.

He lost it.

How could I, his mother, the one who loves him, ever dream of asking him to throw away something as precious and irreplaceable as a bent, crumpled, and generally maimed pair of stickers? Toy Story stickers, no less. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth before that crumpled mess of stickers made it to the trash can. And Caedmon was upset, too. I promised him there would be other stickers. I wasn’t making him throw away the last gross, fuzzy sticker on the face of the planet. He wasn’t certain about that.

And then he somehow managed to get into his activity drawers in the kitchen and find the stickers he’d gotten in his Christmas stocking. I gladly ripped into a package and told him he could have some, then went back to working in his room. When I came back to the kitchen, this is what I found.

He was so happy. Yes, that was every sticker on the sheet, and then some.

Husband was in the process of taking the toddler bed apart when we ran into a snag. One of the bolts was not coming out. As in, strip-the-bolt-head, never-move-the-mattress-again not coming out. He had to leave to go borrow a truck for the great furniture move, and I texted NLB, who was bringing Caedmon’s mattress. He grabbed a tool before leaving the house so he could once again save us.

While Husband was gone, I continued moving toys, cleaning, and generally trying to keep Caedmon out of trouble. He asked approximately 749 more questions and my brain really began to hurt.

Husband returned with furniture and a friend to help him unload it. They got it in the house and got ready to take the truck back. But as he was walking out the door, Husband said, “Why don’t you ask Momma if you can have some of that Sprite I brought home for you?”

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

So then Caedmon started bouncing up and down even more, in anticipation of the Sprite he was going to get. But first we had to have an argument over why he couldn’t drink it from the bottle and must use a cup and stay in the kitchen. The difficult life he leads.

I returned to wiping the new furniture down, getting it ready to go into Caedmon’s room. And guess what? Caedmon somehow managed to spill his Sprite. In the living room. On the carpet. Where he wasn’t supposed to be. I stopped to clean the carpet, all while listening to the boy cry over not getting any more Sprite to drink because a) I’d already told him that was all he was getting, and b) he’d disobeyed and brought in into the living room. See? I’m completely evil.

NLB arrived with vice grips and managed to remove the offending bolt so we could finally disassemble the toddler bed. He and Husband got it moved out and began moving the new furniture in. They went out to bring in the mattress from NLB’s truck and found out it was wet on one end. Apparently there was…guk…from snow/ice that somehow got on it during the moving process. So I sat in the living room floor, cleaning the mattress while they finished moving the furniture into place.

By that time, this pregnant girl was done. Overdone. But there was still much to do. And all that kept me going was remembering how smart I was to make my chiropractor appointment at 2:30 so I could go after we were done with all of this mess. And I’d already decided to get a Red Velvet Cheesecake Blast from Sonic after Caedmon went to bed that night. Those two thoughts brought a second wind.

But then I had to go re-anchor the furniture we moved and the new stuff.

We finally managed to get everything put in its place, at least in Caedmon’s room. (Little Sister’s room is another story. We won’t even think about that right now.) Caedmon was so excited about his new bed, the new sheets and comforter, and new Snoopy knobs on the dresser.

He’s already put his favorite things on the nightstand.

And Snoopy is happy in his new home too.

I’ve never seen this boy so ready for naptime. I had to teach him how to crawl under the covers. Though if he decides sleeping on top is the way to go, I don’t guess I’ll be too upset.

Of course, it took him a while to go to sleep. But sleep he did. I consider it a success.

And while he napped? I left Husband at home and went to the chiropractor and the home improvement store to find some new bolts for the crib.

And I did get my Red Velvet Cheesecake Blast that night after he went to bed. I ate the whole thing. And I might have licked the edge of the cup a little bit. I’m not a big ice cream eater, but I cannot get enough of that thing. I might just break down into tears when they take it off the menu.

Little Sister’s room will be another epic story when it’s time to get it ready. I’m just thankful that she won’t know what her room looks like for a while. I don’t think I’m ready to do this again any time soon!