Just Some Thoughts

I feel so behind in so many ways. I’m not pushing myself to get things done, just really trying to enjoy the newborn phase and ease back into things. Also, I want to make sure I spend plenty of time with Caedmon in these first days. He loves his little sister, and I’d like for things to stay that way.

There are some things I don’t mind leaving undone…clean laundry can sit in baskets until we wear it again, dishes can be washed one at a time if we need to use them, and picking up toys at this point seems completely futile. But there are some things I just can’t leave alone. When you’re as Type A as I am and you’re almost a month behind in balancing your checkbook and budget, you start to twitch a bit.

I’m twitching a lot right now.

But I am really enjoying these days. We’re not pressed to go anywhere (and nobody expects us to look put-together when we do, which is nice) and we can stay at home in our pajamas if we feel like it. And that’s all completely ok for a little while. Honestly though, I’m ready to get into a routine. I’m ready to get my feet on the ground with the whole two-kid thing and get some semblance of a normal schedule going.

Yesterday Caedmon had a dentist appointment. It was not scheduled on the best day, or the best date. It’s the filling we had to reschedule in February when he got sick. Yeah…we rescheduled in February and took the first available appointment. In May. I knew I would have a tiny baby (at least I was hoping she’d be here a week after her due date), and we’d have to completely ruin a perfectly good KDO day, but there was nothing else I could do. So I picked Caedmon up early and we went. Honor went with us.

I think Caedmon went to a “public place” (not a family member’s house or doctor’s appointment) for the first time at 6 weeks old. It was The Catfish Hole…a perfectly wonderful place for your first official outing to be. Honor, at 3 1/2 weeks, has already been several places. Everyone was right when they said the second (or subsequent) kid just gets drug along wherever you have to go. Because there aren’t a lot of choices.

And I’m kinda ok with it. We’re being very judicious of where we’re taking her and for how long, really only when I don’t have the option of leaving her. She has slept almost every place I’ve had to take her. And it’s not like people are breathing all over her. And, probably the most important part, I feel 1000 times better at this point than I did after Caedmon was born. Physically, mentally, emotionally, it’s just been easier this time. I don’t know if it’s because I don’t have the luxury of dwelling on those things or if my body is saying, “I’ve done this before. I got this.” Probably a little bit of both.

If I had more than one pair of jeans that fit, it would be even easier.

With Mother’s Day this weekend, I am reminded yet again just how special it is to be called “Mom.” Or “Momma” or “Mommy,” as Caedmon has started saying recently. My “people” gave me my gift early. I love it. And them.