Saturday, August 05, 2006

Naked or Nekkid?

I debated on whether or not to even make this post. And obviously decided to just put it out there and just see what happens. So here goes.

I’ve always heard it said that “naked” is when you don’t have clothes on, and “nekkid” is when you don’t have clothes on and you’re doing something that maybe you shouldn’t. I think I saw something the other day that could qualify as “nekkid.”

It was a Saturday. Husband and I had walked the dogs a good two miles or so to burn off some of their energy. We’d made our way home and were spending some time being lazy. Something caught Argus’ attention in the backyard, and the barking commenced. Husband peeked through the blinds to see what was going on.

Now, I know that most of you know this. But a “privacy fence” isn’t exactly “private.” No matter how new/old the fence is, there are small cracks between the boards, and especially from far away, you can see through the fence. Not in detail, mind you, but you can tell what’s going on.

So peeking thru the blinds, Husband says, “It’s the neighbor kid. He’s playing in the water.” (Meaning Non-English Speaking Neighbor’s kid.) “Looks like he’s putting water in one of those drinking fountain jugs and pouring it on himself.” Wow. Entertainment at its finest. And then, with a little trepidation in his voice, I heard, “And I think he’s naked.”

“What? Naked? In the back yard? Right now?” I didn’t even want to get up and look. A chicken I have to see. A naked kid I do not. Especially one that's old enough to know better. So we spent the next few minutes wondering if we should call someone…if it was legal…if we would get in trouble somehow for knowing there was a naked kid in his backyard. And then we thought of the other neighbors…what about Orange Truck kids? Wow…I’m pretty sure OTGuy and OTGirl would NOT be happy if OTK#1 (who happens to be female) were to point out what was going on in the neighbor’s yard. And NESN’s new next-door neighbors have small kids too…I can just imagine that conversation. New to the neighborhood, just getting to know people, and finding out the neighbor’s kid plays naked in the yard. Wow.

We finally got Argus in the house and made him stay inside for a while. But when nature calls…you have to let him back out. So about an hour later, we had no choice but to let him back outside. After he’d done his business and commenced his barking again, I had to go outside and physically drag the dog back inside. And NESN’s kid was still outside, naked as a jaybird, playing in the water. And not only was he playing in the water, he was playing on a slip-n-slide type contraption. I didn’t actually see anything, you people with dirty minds. But it was while I was out there that he had what I’m assuming is an argument with the lady I call “Granny.” She was, from the sound of her voice, telling him to do something, and he was very loudly telling her he wasn’t going to do it. Now, I can’t say that for sure because they don’t speak English, but I’m pretty sure that’s what was going on.

So let’s analyze this. 10-ish year old kid (who was definitely old enough to know better), playing in the yard, in the water, with no clothes on, for a stinking long time. And arguing with Granny.

Yep, that was most definitely “nekkid.” Pin It


  1. I would have to agree that yes, in fact, he was nekkid. And that is definitely gross! You should call the law. That's what they say on Dukes of Hazzard when someone is nekkid, I'm sure of it!

  2. tymbr9:28 AM

    Once, while I was in a art class, our teacher defined the difference between Nude and Naked, Nude was the abscence of clothes, but the subject is comfortable with their exposure. Naked is unclothed and uncomfortable. Most sculpture is Nude. Adam and Eve were nude before the fruit and naked after.

    Now, I want to trak this proffessor down and add nekkid. I totally can get behind your definition.