Ninja Dog

You know what ninjas are, right? Don’t tell me you’ve never seen a ninja movie. Ninjas are generally small Asian men, swathed in black from head to toe, including these little footie-like shoes that divide their toes into two sections – sort of like mittens for feet. They have their weapon of choice; usually throwing stars, nun chucks, samurai swords, etc. Ninjas almost seem to defy gravity as they bound around and bounce off of walls and jump from great heights. They come out of nowhere and after a heated battle with lots of incoherent screaming, melt back into the darkness from whence they came. Now, if you saw a ninja, dressed in his “street clothes” at the grocery store, you’d never guess they were actually ninjas. They obviously have to have secret identities or else they’d never get anything done. Could you see going shopping in your black ninja pajama type outfit and everybody who thinks they’re somebody tries to pick a fight? No, ninjas are stealth and cunning to the very core.

As I mentioned in my previous post, Criket is what Husband and I like to call a “Ninja Dog.” True, she’s white, not black. But there are white ninjas too (haven’t you seen Beverly Hills Ninja?). And she’s certainly not Asian, but we’ll just pretend that part doesn’t count.

Her weapon of choice…well, she has several in her arsenal. The one she pulls out most often is cuteness. She can turn it on and off like a light. One minute she’s tired and grouchy; the next she’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. Her big brown eyes staring up at you, ears limp, head cocked ever so slightly to the side…yep, she’s irresistible. Then she sighs really big with those big brown eyes glistening at you. Makes you want to scoop her up and hug her to pieces. And you’ve fallen for her trap. You see, she’s melting your heart now because she’s either just done something you haven’t found yet, or she’s planning something you won’t find until later (lately it’s been of the poop persuasion).

She’s the climber in the family. She’s happiest when she’s at the highest elevation possible. Turn your back for a second with the dining room chair pulled out from under the table, and she’ll be on top of it. Or better yet, if Husband leaves his chair pulled out at his computer desk, the next thing you know she’s chatting online with someone in Australia. That leads me to her next weapon…

She’s a sneaky little thing. She can sneak around the house for hours and unless you’re looking for her or her collar is on (her dog tags jingle), you’d never know where she was. The fact that she loves small, dark places doesn’t help much either. Not too long ago, Husband set a plate of thick crust, Meatlover’s pizza on his desk and went to answer the phone. You guessed it – he forgot and left the chair out. When he came back all of 45 seconds later, he found three half-eaten slices of Meatlover’s pizza, and Criket, sitting in the floor like nothing happened. The best part of this story is that the reason Husband came back so quickly is that Argus saw what she was doing, ran to Husband and tattled on her. At least we have one rule-follower in the family.

If there’s any incoherent noise going on around here, it’s usually of Criket’s doing somehow. She’s really not what I would call a vocal dog because she’s so quiet most of the time. However, when she gets upset about something, everyone knows it. She’s the loudest little dog I’ve ever seen in my life. She also sounds pretty funny because she doesn’t quite bark. She has this half-bark half-howl thing going for her. All I know is that it bugs the barker (Argus) and causes him to bark back – very loud.

Most people are deceived by Criket and her uncanny cuteness and sweetness. It’s hard to explain that she’s the cause of most doggie arguments around this house, and is almost always the instigator when it comes to canine mischief. She’s just smart enough to make it look like it’s all Argus’ fault.

And that’s what ninjas are all about.